How Not to be a Dbag at Fenway
Posted on April 23, 2010
Filed Under 2010 Season, Fenway Park | 2 Comments
Every year there are a few guys in the stands at Fenway Park that think they are the cleverest fellas to ever pop out of a womb at the South Shore Hospital.. but they aren’t. Here are a few ways to avoid being that guy that in 2010:
During an Adrian Beltre at-bat, try your hardest not to yell out “AAAADDDRRIIAAAANNN” like Sylvester Stalone in a Rocky movie. It’s guaranteed that you’ll sound like you’re having a stroke instead.
Kevin Youkilis’ at-bat music is ‘Just A Friend’ by Biz Markie. Avoid standing on your seat and pointing at some random bro three aisles away while singing “AND YOU SAY HE’S JUST A FRIEND” at the top of your lungs.
Yes, Marco Scutaro is a funny name. No, it’s not funny to have one person yelp “MARCO!” while the other covers his eyes and shouts “SCUTARO!” back. Marco Polo is a fun game to play in the pool when it’s 97 degrees out but it’s hardly witty to pretend you’re playing while packed in a tight space with 37,000 other people.
‘Dead Poets Society’ is a pretty decent movie but standing on your chair and re-enacting the “OH CAPTAIN, MY CAPTAIN!” scene while Jason Varitek has struck out 4 times is not a good move.
These are all things I witnessed at my first game of the 2010 season. Come on guys, stick to your crazy Japanese techno dancing during Okajima Okie-Dokie and yelling “YOOOOOOOUUUK” like the rest of us. We’ve got an example to set for fans of teams that can’t sell out 550+ straight games.
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Oh my god, there are so many things I could add to this list.
Haha please do. These are the only ones that stood out after seeing the 12th inning walk-off against the Rangers.